27.3.2013 – On the other side

by deanmelbourne

How did I find myself at 2am in the ice banging on a neighbours door demanding that they turned off their musical Christmas tree that echoed up the chimney breast and in to my room.

A shocked face appeared apologetically and more than a little bewildered at the door.

This wasn’t the first time. I had been the angry neighbour for a while. Semidetached small council housing from the thirties were built often with hollow. Floors and very solid walls. The bouncing grandchildren became the fixation my anxiety needed.

I was ill back then I realise that now. Since then my neighbours and I have been distant. They are a lovely old couple, a little deaf so the war films are a little loud and conversation is not always easy. But good good people. They never trusted me after the insanity of the Christmas tree.

Geoff died last night.

My amazing wife performed CPR with the ambulance crew for 40mins. I sat on the other side of the wall oblivious. She arrived home from her shift as a intensive care sister as the ambulance pulled up. I’m so proud that she was able to help.

His wife will be alone I guess now. They have sons and grandchildren around.

I’m sorry that what you saw of me was my illness. I’m sorry that it had a impact on your life. That I wasn’t the neighbour I could have been.

Oh perfect Dean lets make the death of a man about you….

Yellow disk sun through snow clouds. Upstairs curtain remain drawn